I have interviewed CEOs, founders, investors, creators, activists and artists. But nothing could have prepared me for the sheer joy — the delight — of interviewing two men whose work has touched nearly every childhood memory across multiple generations.

Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield. The original “Ben and Jerry.” The slowest kids in 7th grade gym class. The two friends at the back of the pack who turned their shared pace into a lifelong partnership and a global brand.

When they appeared on my screen for our Women Leaders Association quarterly summit, something instantly softened in the virtual room. Not because they are icons. But because they are disarmingly normal. Warm. Modest. A little mischievous. And overwhelmingly clear about what matters.

This conversation wasn’t just about ice cream. It was about how to build something meaningful without losing your humanity along the way.

A business that began with community, not scale

Ben and Jerry opened their first homemade ice cream parlor 45 years ago in Burlington, Vermont. No MBAs. No market analysis. No “brand strategy deck.” Just two guys, a tiny shop, a dream, and a town that quickly became part of their story.

Long before “corporate social responsibility” became a buzzword, they were living it — not as a tactic, but as a natural extension of how they saw the world.

They hosted fall festivals in the park.
They screened free outdoor movies.
They gave away ice cream on their anniversary as a thank-you to the community when they weren’t even sure they’d survive another year.

These weren’t marketing campaigns. They were expressions of gratitude. Acts of belonging.

When Ben said:

“As your business supports the community, the community supports your business.”

It didn’t sound like a principle. It sounded like something he had lived with his whole body.

Values as a starting point, not a conclusion

Ten years in, when the company was still scrappy and figuring things out, they formalized something that would shape the next four decades:

A three-part mission
A product mission
An economic mission
A social mission

All equal. All written down. All non-negotiable.

The idea was simple:
If values are important, they have to begin at the beginning, not get tacked on after the press release.

As Ben put it:

“Values end up in the right place only if they start in first place.”

I found myself nodding harder than expected. Running Feisworld, helping my mom with Xiang Li Art, building community in Worcester, Boston and Cambridge here in Massachusetts — I’ve seen how easy it is for values to slip down the list when things get busy. Hearing Ben and Jerry talk about writing their mission down, early, imperfectly, hit me in a tender place.

The myth of expertise — and why friendship came first

One thing that made the audience laugh again and again was how openly Ben and Jerry talked about their lack of business background.

No training.
No roadmap.
No “business school playbook.”

Their friendship was the container that allowed everything else to work. Their differences were the engine.

Ben is creative, risk-taking, anti-authoritarian — the kind of person who gets lost on purpose because getting lost turns a walk into an adventure.

Jerry is calm, steady, methodical — the kind of person who quietly finds the path back when Ben’s adventure has drifted a little too far.

They had very clear roles. Jerry made the ice cream. Ben sold it.
They each had veto power, though they almost never used it.

The best part was their rule for disagreement
Whoever felt more strongly “won,” because trust mattered more than being right.

It made me think about my own partnerships — with German, with Adam, with Tripti, with my mother, with the people I collaborate with across Feisworld. Our best work happens when we’re different in ways that strengthen each other, not mirror each other.

Bringing values into a growing company — and the reality that not everyone will agree

As Ben and Jerry’s grew, something surprising happened. When they tried to democratize decision making around values, they realized something important

If values are decided by majority vote, you only get vanilla.

Literally vanilla.
The flavor committee’s only consensus was… vanilla.

The same was true for values. When you open big questions to everyone, you often get the safest possible answers. “Support children and families.” “Be good to the environment.” Nothing controversial. Nothing bold.

Ben and Jerry realized they needed to lead with clarity.
Not everyone had to personally believe the same things.
But everyone had to support the mission during work hours.

You could disagree privately. That was your right.
But when you showed up at Ben and Jerry’s, you were there to advance the mission, just as you were there to make great ice cream and keep the company profitable.

Hearing this struck me deeply.
Growing Feisworld, working with clients, shaping communities — it reminded me that mission requires leadership, not consensus. Consensus dilutes. Leadership clarifies.

Activism as relationship, not marketing

One thing I admire most about Ben and Jerry is how they talk about activism without ever sounding performative.

Many corporations treat activism as a branding exercise.
Ben and Jerry treat activism as part of the company’s DNA.

They take stands many businesses would consider too risky:

Criminal justice reform
Environmentalism
Racial equality
National budget priorities
Freeing Julian Assange
Dismantling white supremacy

They know these stances alienate some customers.
They do it anyway.

Ben said something that has been echoing in my head since

“It only helps to take a stand if it’s controversial. Otherwise it’s not taking a stand — it’s agreeing with everybody.”

Jerry added that even people who disagree often respect the courage to speak out.

This feels especially true in 2026, when companies often speak only in safe, softened language. Ben and Jerry’s clarity feels almost radical by comparison.

The soft skills and the honesty that leaders rarely admit

I asked a question about soft skills, and Ben immediately said he was “kind of weak” in that area.

He talked about how Jerry often walked behind him, gently smoothing over conversations after Ben had bluntly pointed out what was wrong.

There was something so human about this exchange.
No defensiveness. No shame. Just honesty.

Over time, Ben said he learned something that changed the way he communicated with employees:

Positive feedback is a deposit.
Negative feedback is a withdrawal.
You cannot withdraw unless you’ve deposited first.

I could feel the room soften.
There is something universal about learning this lesson the hard way.

Jerry talked about leading from empathy, not hierarchy. They were never “bosses.” They were people who had been employees for most of their lives, and they understood what it felt like to be on the receiving end of decisions.

It reminded me of the community work I do in Worcester MA, and how leading with humanity is often the only way forward.

Women, leadership and the courage to change how business operates

When we shifted to talking about women in leadership, they didn’t hesitate. Both acknowledged something many women know but rarely hear men articulate:

Women lead differently.
More nurturing.
More relational.
More concerned with life than ego.

And business needs that.

Ben offered a warning too:
Sometimes women who rise to the top feel pressured to imitate masculine leadership styles, losing the very qualities that make their leadership powerful.

I felt that in my chest. So many women I admire lead with a combination of strength and tenderness that transforms their organizations. Hearing Ben and Jerry validate that openly felt like a breath of fresh air.

What I am carrying forward from Ben and Jerry

After this interview, my heart felt full in a way I didn’t expect. Yes, I wanted ice cream — urgently. But more than that, I felt anchored.

Here is what I am holding on to:

A business can be a force for connection, not extraction.
Values can begin on day one, even when you’re small.
Partnership thrives when friendship comes first.
Leadership is not about being the loudest voice, but the clearest.
Communities remember how you make them feel, not how you market to them.
Being controversial is sometimes part of doing the right thing.
And ice cream — like kindness — is best shared.

The chat during the interview was filled with so many flavors. More than 2000 attendees voted on their favorite flavors.

Chunky Monkey
Cherry Garcia
Phish Food
The Tonight Dough
New York Super Fudge Chunk
Chocolate Therapy

What’s your favorite?

But what people kept returning to was their memories.
Their childhood visits to the Burlington factory.
Their parents introducing them to their first pint.
Their college nights, their first dates, their celebrations.

Ben and Jerry created more than a brand.
They created a feeling.

And that, to me, is the magic, and the lesson.

My Ben and Jerry Ice Cream Memories with Family and Friends

Ben and Jerry also talked about how their ice cream flavors and ingredients transformed over the decades to become even more inclusive. As someone who’s gluten sensitive, I can easily find flavors I enjoy. My mom who is diabetic can find sugar free options. Even our favorite English bulldog living next door can find his favorite doggie treats!

Did you know that you can also stop by Ben and Jerry Ice Cream shops to enjoy with friends? We’ve taken our friend Jorge’s kids to the one at Natick MA a few times. Ice cream indeed tastes better together with friends. Find a shop near you >>